Jul 24, 2011

8 years ago....

8 years ago with a cry of shock and surprise that the heavy bulk within me had suddenly left my body, I took my first step into the unknown world of motherhood. A wet slippery body was placed into my arms, and I stared into the still face of my daughter, her mass of black hair sticking up all over the place, looking sooooooo completely beautiful. The cord was cut, separating her from me completely physically,  so she could grow and be her own little person. 8 years ago I didn't even think about what she would be when she grew, for now, she was my tiny and beautiful Mop.

8 years ago I learned how completely and utterly heart-wrenching having a child of your own torn away from you and taken off to have medical treatment so that they could live. I learned that 4 hours can feel like a lifetime when you don't know what is happening to that beautiful little girl you held just for a moment.
I learned what effect that little life would have on me when the doctor told us grim news about our baby. Possible brain damage. Possibly going to be flown to a far away hospital during the night. You can't take her home. You can see her, but you can't hold her. You can't take her home. We don't know what will happen. We don't know what happened. I also believe in a God who would help me, no matter what the outcome. I learned that before Mop was a day old, that I had to place her into the hands of the Father and trust him. I learned about real joy and jubilation when 5 days later, against all odds, I took my baby home.

8 years ago, I began the steep learning curve of motherhood - and it's something I would do again and again and again.

8 years ago, God gave me my beautiful baby girl. 8 years ago she was still a baby, today she is a tall, long, smart, beautiful, sweet, funny girl with a big smile, a big heart and laughter that sounds like bubbles.

Happy birthday my Mop. I love you bigger than the galaxy.


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